Most people who grew up with a narcissistic parent do not arrive at that description easily. It tends to come after years of quietly wondering why their relationships feel so complicated, why they work so hard to keep people happy, or why intimacy feels both desperately wanted and faintly terrifying. Understanding what happened in your family is not about blame.…
You had a roof over your head, you went on holidays, and nobody hit anyone. From the outside, your family looked perfectly ordinary, maybe even enviable. Yet something never felt quite right. You learnt early to read the room, to know what mood a parent was in before you even opened the front door. You made yourself smaller, quieter, less…
You are the one who manages the appointments, tracks the medication, fields the calls from school, sits with the diagnosis, absorbs the fear, and keeps things running. You are probably very good at it. And you are probably exhausted in a way that is hard to explain to people who have not lived it. This post is for carers. Not…
A report published this week by researchers at the University of Edinburgh and University of Melbourne brings into focus one of the most overlooked forms of childhood bereavement: growing up after one parent has killed the other. It is a subject that rarely surfaces in public conversation, and when it does, the child’s experience is often an afterthought. This post…
There is a kind of grief that does not get a card. No one brings you food. No one asks how you are doing three months later. You do not get time off work, or flowers, or a socially sanctioned reason to cry. And yet something real has gone. Something that mattered, deeply, to you. This is invisible loss. And…
This post is not about addiction. It is about you. It is about what it is like to love someone whose relationship with alcohol or substances has taken over the room. To watch someone you care about disappear into something you cannot compete with, cannot fix, and cannot make them stop. To feel furious and frightened at the same time.…
A late diagnosis often feels like finding the final piece of a puzzle. You might feel relief. You might also feel grief or confusion. Many adults reach this point after years of anxiety, burnout, or a sense that they are “wrong.” You are not wrong. You are neurodivergent. Language That Belongs to You The Journey of Rediscovery Late diagnosis or…
People often ask me a question that sounds simple. “Why don’t you just tell me what to do?” They ask it after they describe a week of circular thinking. They ask it when they feel trapped between two options that both look bad (or equally good!). They ask it when they feel tired of hearing themselves talk. You ask for…
How Psychotherapy can help with you feel lonely You can have messages waiting, plans in the diary, maybe a partner at home, colleagues who like you, and still feel oddly alone. Not “I have no one.” More “no one really has me, or no one really gets me.” This kind of loneliness can feel confusing. You might feel embarrassed by…
The modern boundary problem rarely starts with a dramatic argument. It starts with a small ping. A work message at 9:47 pm. A family member “just checking in” with a question that is really a demand. A friend who tells you everything, then disappears when you need them. You try to be kind. You try to be flexible. You try…